Running vs. Restructuring (pt. 1)


Running is defined as:

1. the act of a person, animal or thing that runs.

2. managing or directing.

3. an act or instance of running.

Now, nowhere in those definitions do you see anything that pertains to a relationship and that’s simply because you cannot run from a situation. I’ll get back to this point.

In a relationship, many people choose to think that when things go wrong they can (or should) just run away from the problem and it will fix itself. Most people accomplish this by just shutting down altogether and/or leaving the relationship. Neither of these tactics will ever work because (once again) you cannot run away from a  situation. Situations/relationships have to be worked out, restructured and or resolved.

Working it out – Communication is imperative (I say this a lot) and is needed if one is ever to resolve issues of any kind. Shutting down only leads to further discontent and small pockets of issues that never get resolved. This leads to further issues and resentment.

Restructuring – After a healthy line of communication has been established (healthy meaning that both parties not only talk to each other but are fully heard by each other) couples can get to the restructuring (rebuilding) of their relationship (if applicable). Rebuilding after massive issues in a relationship can be hard but necessary if the relationship is to last.

Resolving – after all has been said and done there will be decisions to be made and sometimes the only way to resolve an issue is to let it go. Each relationships resolution will be different contingent upon ALL the factors that caused the issue in the first place in addition to how those issues were handled.

More to come in part 2 in which we will discuss how to effectively restructure something that has been damaged.

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